The Slow Dance – Mustard and Ale Cheddar, Bacon, and Broccoli Grilled Cheese

I know, I know, it’s been a long time and I’m sorry. I could spend the next few sentences explaining my lack of grilled cheesiness but I’d rather not. Let’s talk about something better. Something new and weird and sort of exciting. Sounds good, right?

Alright, well let me just think about what I want to talk about.

Oh right! Exotic Corn dogs! That’s it. Think about it. Are you getting hungry yet? I know that it may sound like the name of some kitschy male stripper joint in South Florida, but I’m talking about the real thing here. No leopard print g-strings (ehhh, maybe, we’ll get back to that), oiled up pecs, or bulging private parts, but instead, imagine a savory apple and pork sausage, skewered, dipped in a rosemary infused corn dog batter and then deep fried to golden perfection. I’m getting horny hungry just thinking about it.

You might be asking yourself “What the hell is she talking about?” so let me give you some more background info. I’ve been wanting to open up a cutesy little grilled cheese spot for some time now and ever since Smorgasburg opened (a Brooklyn based taste-orgy that goes on every weekend) I thought it would be awesome to have my own little booth. Unfortunately there’s already a grilled cheese spot, Milk Truck (enter bizarre anger video here), so I can’t open up a booth based on my one true love. But when I went there and blew all of my money over the weekend, I had a revelation. Just because I can’t do GC’s doesn’t mean that this dream of mine has to be crushed like that time when I was twelve and found out that Furby’s aren’t cute but instead absolutely horrifying. Nope. So on Saturday afternoon, my friend and I spent about 8 hours daydreaming/obsessing over opening a fancy pants corn dog spot because, I mean, why not? And how awesome does that sound? There’s about a million awesome combos and you can even make the sticks cool! Needless to say, it got kind of weird with that one.

Which brings me to this: How good would this little grilled cheese be, which is made up of broccoli, bacon, and mustard seed and ale cheddar cheese, as a corn dog. AH!

Here’s what you’ll need, pre-corn-dog phase:


– 1 piece of foccacia, sliced in half
– 2 tbsp of crumbled cooked bacon
– about a cup of sliced Red Dragon Mustard seed
  and ale cheddar cheese
– 2 tbsp of steamed broccoli
– 2 pats of salted butter

So the cheese that I used was found at Trader Joe’s. It’s a Welsh cheddar that has mustard seeds and ale infused in it. It’s super pliable and after sitting out for only a few minutes, it was already starting to melt. This might or might not have had something to do with the fact that it’s been like hotter than a devil’s dingdong in NYC lately. Anyways, the cheese mostly tastes like mustard and it melts beautifully and it was pretty cheap for a big ole hunk.

I just cut it into thin little slices because it was too soft to grate. My grater cried all night because he’s sensitive like that.

Then I piled on some cooked broccoli.

I just did a quick, non-thorough little search on my website and realized that I don’t think I’ve ever done a post with broccoli. What the **** kind of **** is that? I’m totally freaked out by myself about this.

GAH. I’m so disappointed in you, MacKenzie. This was your favorite vegetable as a kid. Remember demanding dinosaur trees until your face turned purple from screaming and your little brother hid under the bed because he thought you were possessed? Yeah, I sort of blocked that one out, too. 

Anyways, broccoli, it’s good to have you back.

Now comes the crumbled bacon part. MAKE IT RAIN PORK! Throw it up in the air and dance around. Let yourself feel the free flowing nature of a pig rooting around the muck. Just make sure to do this by yourself, others don’t seem to “get” it.

 Top it off with some more cheese and quit pulling your hair out from excitement.

Add the top piece of bread on top and smear it with some nice salty butter. Use the real stuff. Seriously dude, or else we’re not friends anymore. NOT EVEN ONLINE!

Heat up a burner to medium high and put your sandwich in, buttered-side down. Let it cook for a few minutes until it gets all crispy and toasted and then smear some butter on the non-buttered side and flip it.

Shampoo, rinse, repeat until it’s nice and even on both sides. Leave out the shampooing and rinsing. Let it sit for a few minutes to tighten up before eating.

Alright, so hopefully this tasty little sandwich will make up for my lack of posting. If it doesn’t and you’re still angry with me, I’ll make you a corn dog when I open up my dream corn dog stand on the Williamsburg Waterfront.

Oh and one last thing, if anyone is interested in wearing a leopard print g-string bikini and helping me sell these in the near future. Email me at Thanks!




  1. Warning: this cheese is pretty strong (in the mustard dept.) I love mustard so it worked out for me when I made this last night but just thought I'd put it out there. I think it somewhat overpowered the broccoli and bacon *gasp* … so if I was to make this again I'd probably opt for less cheese.


  2. LOVE the idea of the fancy corndog stand. Any chance you want to hook a sistuh up with the recipe for that delicious corndog you described? Arizona is a long way from NY so I'll have to recreate your magic in my kitchen :).

    Best of luck!


  3. Jeez! I don't even like broccoli or bacon (I know I know, I don't like ice cream, chocolate, coffee, or nutella either) but this sandwich looks DELICIOUS!! I love the way you put it together too!


  4. I just found your blog via a post on Pinterest and I'm hooked just with this first sandwich! It looks so delicous. I've never heard of this kind of cheese, I'm going to keep an eye out for it. Can't wait to read some more of your blog, I do love grilled cheese. I know I definitely would but corn dogs from you!


  5. I made this today,couldn't find this cheese so I used regural cheddar and mustard seeds. The result was amazing, like i couldn't think that broccoli would pair so damn good with the other ingredients. It's my favorite vegetable though, too (and beets, who doesn't like beets?)


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